I've been blogging about how to make any piece of writing more literary or meaningful. As we all know, the first page, the first line, is critical. If a reader swings by to sample your book through Amazon or a book store, one boring line is enough to leave your book gathering dust. The same is true for the introduction of your character. Your reader may forgive an action or thought that seems untrue to your character later. But while you're just introducing your character, there has to be that something, that unique sweetness, that compelling charm, that devil inside, something that makes the character want to join your protagonist and other main characters on a journey. Plus, a weak or cliched antagonist is enough to make your book fall flat. Otherwise, all the brilliant scenery, plotting, clever word plays, etc. in the world will not save your book.
Imagine you're in college, and your roommate walks in. Think of what would be the biggest turnoff for you, the one thing he/she/they/it would say that would make you go, "Here we go. I wonder how fast I can transfer to a new room." THAT in a character may also get your book shelved for the foreseeable future by anyone. Do any of the following, and your character will end up like that roommate, in the dust.
1. Be a data dumper. Imagine that roommate, Pat for the sake of argument, walks in and throws their entire life story on you in the first five minutes. Too many novice authors think this is the best way that the reader can know everything they need to know about your character and their world. Granted, there are classical novels that do this, but it won't work today. Sneak those details in later.
2. Be a punching bag or a victim. Okay, say Pat walks in the room and doesn't do much. You try to start a discussion or an argument. You may get a rise, but it's only in response to what you do. This character never takes the initiative. Stuff is done to them, and they respond. This is the kind of character that makes for dull reading. Pat can take it one step further and whine about everything, becoming more annoying still and a victim. Either way, Pat would have a hard time keeping readers interested.
3. Be entirely repulsive and irredeemable. Say Pat walks in and kicks your cat. You'd be filing charges before you take your second breath. This is true of protagonists, antagonists, and everything in between. If you think of everyone as the hero in their own story, you'll realize that everyone has a reason to do what they do. If the reader sees that your villain hates humans and wants them all dead EXCEPT the crazy cat ladies of the world because he loves his grandmother and delusionally thinks she will die unless everyone else does, you have a motivation. You have humanization. You don't like what he's doing, but at least it has an internal logic.
The same is true of your hero. He/she/it/they can be an antihero, sure, but think of "Guardians of the Galaxy." They're pretty selfish and don't always act like upstanding citizens, but they're a out of fun to watch and always save the metaphoric cat in the end. Occasionally, an absolute and irredeemable jerk of a villain or, even more occasionally, a protagonist, works, but they're not something to overuse, and you should have a reason to use them.
4. Be too perfect. In internet/fanfic terms, they are a Mary Sue/Gary Stu. Say Pat comes in and says and does everything perfectly. You spend the week with Pat, and in looks, in actions, in EVERYTHING, Pat is flawless and perfect. Pat knows how to do everything faster, better, kinder, more heroically than you. Pat has NO flaws. How do you relate to Pat? You really don't. No human does. Without flaws, like some iterations of Superman, Pat would be admirable in a distant sort of way, but just not interesting or relatable. Since a good story grows out of the flaws and weaknesses of the main character, the story is bound to fall flat as well. And a reader very quickly knows it.
5. Be an ego on wheels. Pat steps into your room, and looks not at you but into the mirror. Everything Pat says is about Pat. This can go hand-in-hand with being a Mary Sue or Gary Stu. It really doesn't matter if Pat is the literal god of beauty. If you've got a main character whose head won't fit in the room due to a swollen ego, there better be something or someone standing nearby with a needle to pop said ego (even if it's the narrative itself showing the character is not as great as all that), or you're going to lose the reader quickly.
6. Show up with a parade then disappear. Say Pat walks in with an entourage. Everything about Pat is awesome and exciting. Every word Pat says is fascinating. Confetti flies everywhere. Then, within about a page or two, Pat blends into the scenery (or gets murdered or dies of cancer or just disappears) and it turns out you're the main character, and no one warned you. If you make a big deal of a character or event, it better be for a reason and with a payoff, or your reader will feel offended and angry at you personally as the author.
7. Be a Picasso in the land of impressionism. If your main character, your villain, or anyone else stands out as a bad fit for the word around them, too dark/too light/too something/just wrong, it's going to bug the reader unless there's a reason. Sometimes, you have a happy world, and a knight of Cerebus shows up (a vile villain in a saccharine story) to darken and deepen the story, it can work if done well. But if the character just proceeds among the crowd and is unexplained and does nothing to justify this difference in tone, it won't be done well. If everyone is wacky or strange, one more strange character won't stand out. The problem is when it's just one freak in a normal world for no reason at all. This can be an extreme in any direction, too stupid, too smart, too pretty, etc. If you know what you're doing, go ahead. If not, tread lightly.
There are so many other ways to botch an introduction. Read examples of good introductions to avoid all of this. Above is a list of just a few of the ways to get it wrong. Look carefully at your characters and how they are introduced. Does each one work in a compelling way that fits with your world? If not, you have some work to do.
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